Taking a Deeper Look at the Domestic Violence in Our Black Community
It’s no secret that we are in a crisis around the World. We are living in times where everybody is fighting for some type of justice connected to their truths. There are so many women who are being abused, especially black women. Since the passage of the Violence Against Women Act in 1994, the central response to domestic violence in the U.S. has been criminal.
In some states, there is not legislation to protect victims from behaviors that lead up to the domestic violence and that is where both state and federal lawmakers can play their part in clearly defining what is considered domestic violence and hopefully protect more families. After having several conversations with domestic violence victims, I learned that this was more than just a punch to the noise, name-calling, withholding money, or even down outright control in these kinds of relationships.
It was about the lack of experiencing divine love from early childhood and the mismanagement of spiritual energy in both men and women. As a domestic violence survivor, it forced me to look at the situation from a holistic spiritual perspective and will share with you what I learned.
Men and Women Do Not Know Their Roles
The first aha moment for me was learning that men and women do not know their roles in relationships resulting in toxic masculinity and femininity behaviors. A lot of men have been taught to be the leader in the relationship and with good reason. Men are born with natural leadership skills that should be utilized to direct his family towards their divine life purpose, but this is not happening for one reason or another. Instead, many of our black men are caught up in the system, into the street game, or simply don’t give a damn.
A lot of women have been taught to cater to a man and end up losing themselves in the process. They are not prepared for the life experiences that are bound to happen in relationships because we learn so much through relationships. Therefore, their sense of self-worth, self-respect, and ultimately personal power are diminished because they have given their power away and do not know how to properly establish healthy boundaries and teach their partners how to interact with them. Instead, many of our women are happy about being the side piece because they do not understand their own value for one reason or another.
For the women who are not engaging in side piece activities, they accept whatever the men offer to them out of fear of being alone. For same-sex relationships, the basis of this is still the same because we are all born with both masculine and feminine energy that is exhibited in one or more ways. Depending on how one has selected to incarnate on this Earth, he or she will exhibit the dominate energy.
If men and women are not learning from home how to take control of their emotions or how to love, then how do you expect them to be able to take control of their lives and better yet lead someone else down a healthy path? The reality is that both men and women are leaders but the two components that feed positive energy are lacking in relationships, which are respect and love. Men want to be respected and Women wanted to be loved. With these two components, relationships will thrive and move towards committing to a purpose that is greater than the relationship itself.
Identifying and Understanding Generational Patterns
The second aha moment for me was learning that men and women do not know their ancestral, cultural, or personal history for one reason or another. We may view it as a war in the physical, but it is truly what have manifested from our hearts resulting in a spiritual war. A lot of the patterns in which we see happening around the World must be dealt with to heal as a Nation.
Specifically, on a personal level, individuals must learn their generational patterns so that they can see where they fit into that narrative to be able to move forward with their own life purpose. The change that individuals have authority over is within themselves and it requires them to go through the process of pulling back their personal curtain to deal with their own spiritual matters.
For some souls, it may take more than one lifetime to get it right, but we have a lot of lightworkers who are here on Earth to provide a sense of direction to the souls who are willing, ready, and able to make change. At the end of the day, Divine Love is the solution to what we need for humanity as it heals and prospers us all. The key to gaining access is for individuals to start with releasing and forgiving themselves and others so that they can honor their true authentic self and live unapologetically as they share their truths and gifts to move the next generations forward.
Dr. Alicia “Alise” Holland is the author of the best-selling book “From the Bayou to the Phoenix: How to Get Through Life One Transition at a Time. She is an International Spiritual Guide, Talk Show Personality, and Creative Genius who is very passionate about helping people live their best lives by connecting to their intuition to share their truths and their stories. She travels the World spreading her message of “You are Loved, You are Valued, and You are Competent”.
Find her on Twitter: @advisoralise
Find her on Instagram: alise_healing_center
Find her on YouTube: Arizona Alise
Find her on Facebook: Alise Spiritual Healing & Wellness Center